It’s easy to reconnect with your ex, especially now with the help of social media, the temptation is always there. But always remember this, this has been proven and tested: When you stay connected to your ex, you are only giving yourself a hard time and prolonging your healing process. Some of us will always find reasons to reach out to our ex even if we know that It’s best to avoid them. Here are the top four excuses:
If you think you can make it work and are willing to give it another try, hopefully it is because you both have learned from your mistakes and are better people now. But the truth is the odds are not in your favor. And I’m pretty sure you didn’t just stumble across their social media profile either. How long have you been out of contact with them anyway? Why make the same mistake over again? It’s better to move on.
- You Have Moved On But Still Curious
Let’s say you’ve gotten over the breakup and moved on with you life. It’s still okay to be curious, right? So what if you want to stalk, I mean, look up your ex on social media? Your curiosity is going to take you back to the relationship. You may view it through rose-colored glasses now, especially if you are single and feeling lonely. And sure, maybe your ex got fat, went bald and lost all his money, but what if he is now happily married with a family? Do you want to risk seeing that?
- We Can Be Good Friends
Are you sure you don’t have an ulterior motive? Like maybe you’ll start out as friends and then fall in love again? It’s really hard to just be friends with someone who used to be a lover. You have to create new boundaries that you never had before. And also, consider how they treated you while you were romantically attached? If they weren’t a great partner, what makes you sure they would be a good friend?
- They Contacted You First
Let’s say your ex reaches out to you on social media. Let’s say they apologize for hurting you and want to get back together or just be friends. It seems innocent enough, right? You probably won’t be able to make it work this time either. And, how do you know they don’t have an ulterior motive? Maybe they hope friendship will turn into friends with benefits. Maybe they have a new partner they’d like to throw in your face. Just because an ex comes calling, it doesn’t mean you have to answer that call.
In order to achieve soul growth, we need to learn from our mistakes, shed old habits and move on. You aren’t moving on if you’re attached to old relationships and feelings that don’t serve your higher self. Your ex is a reminder of who you used to be. Sometimes it’s just better to leave them in your past—where they belong.